argh... i was nearly able to strike off my jacket! hmm, i found this jacket from SEED which cost 36 bucks. expensive? er, nopes. i found it alright, kinda worth it. but guess what. the colour i wanted was only left with X-Large. it's real nice sweet pinkish red in colour. i love it. maybe it's fated. argh...


went orchard fer shopping spree today. guess i'm really into the great singapore sale. i've got my white sandals, a
purple top and my stretty undies. didn't got my g-strings cause i found out i was spending a little over what i had (ck voucher). all those add up to lyke 60 bucks? gonna get back to ck-tangs to get another white and brown top.


ahuh, and under my own expenses i've spend another 50 plus. yeah, and i do really hope i got the right thing. cause i somehow regretted on a particular compartment. shhhh... i guess i should be happy with it.


er... i'm counting. kkays. i saw many nice 3-quarter pants today. guess i'm gonna get a couple of them. yeah, i'm now having a fettish in them. that should be more than enough fer the moment. if i really happen to work again in june. i'll set fer my contact lenses and adidas. and most of all, my samsung phone!! my levis??


`a different look, a gift and a occasion to celebrate.

heloo people, i've just woke up. haa. sorry. i'm kinda a piggy these days. anyway, everyday i'll dream of something. many characters inside. and some complusory ones too. i wonder why. kkay's. next time if i have a fantastic one going on, i'll write in down in words here in my blog. so do tune in. haa.


er, my sister hebe has a new blog up. don't worry i'll support. and this ish fer her.
hey babe. don't call me pink sugar in yur webbie. haa. cos tt's this template title that i have been lazy to change. haa. thanks.


by the way, i need to rush off bathing and tendering up my stuffs cause i need to zoom off enjoying my sake sushi and great singapore sale. so tata and woosh......


`my dreams linger around you and me.

the bouquet of flowers i saw,
white innocent flavour.
the air i breathe,
sweet sense of peach flavour.


smell and colour today,
all so soothing to me.
the past has been put away,
now forwarding fer the future.


the once path we strolled,
the happiness it gave,
the sorrows all forgotten,
the stars i embraced.


a new door i opened,
should i kiss with joys?
a new door awaits,
i'm on my way.


the sun shone in,
burning my every angle of sight.
but i love it,
with this sweet smoothie flavour.

kkays. people. i've got my photos up. er. don't worry. i'll keep adding until the limited space ish all occupied.
hey. by the way, i've also got my comments box up. so please support and comment kkays. (=
you people could also request stuffs.


`i hope you'll be the one.

kkays people. i'm pretty fine today. hee. nothing much happen. just got out with a friend of mine and enjoyed a drink from starbucks. what have i gotta say? lyke the adidas commercial. it's so darn hot. haa. anyway, i've plan out my shopping list fer this saturday. hee. not much fer myself. enjoy while you can people. by the way, the great singapore sale ish starting this friday. so i guess it's time fer u guys to enjoy the discounts. haa. shop, buy, enjoy.


`he's my darling.

i'm tired.
physically tired.
emotionally tired.
mentally tired.
give me some rest.
i need to breathe.
don't bother me.
thanks.

why ish love so unexpected? why can it hurt a thousand peaceful cells? why can it tingles every little mind of yurs? ever imagine what ish the world lyke without it?


yesterday, nothing really happen. but i came over this thought and kept weeping over it. why? me? unsure of it either. it's just a overbearing hurt that came cutting in my heart. alot of things hurt when you expect too much. am i correct? argh... i really wish not to bother but i can't just place in aside.


i'm not a weak girl. i'm just a emotional creature.


`so can someone tell me, what ish love?

got this new template. hope isn't too pink fer you guys. don't worry. i'm not a fanatic in pink. (=

the weather ish really darn hot. don't you guys think so? everyone ish sweating lyke nobody business. can't you see that? haa. went out yesterday, went to tampines mall. it's really far and when i'm there, i feel so awkward. somehow lyke i don't belong there. caught matrix reloaded. not that nice after all. yeah, i think it's uncool after watching the matrix (my own dvd which i didn't care to take a look fer ages). nothing pretty much happening now or at least i won't tell. ask me personally and i'll let ya know in full details. anyway, i'm kinda lazy to blog today. so tata. i promise i'll be back soon. (=


`my life ish filled with surprises. and now i'm smiling towards it. (=

oh my god, i think this ish killing me!! i can't seem to fall asleep. why? i'm yawning lyke nobody's business and yet while tucking to bed, i just can't seem to fall in dreams. argh!! the horoscope stuffs ar really getting me off everything. i don't even know what the shit to do now. maybe i should just not sleep fer the day until tomorrow night and that's the time i'm gonna snore my way through. sounds cool but will i be able to do that? i want to sleep. i want to sleep.


by the way, i realise that sometimes i feel better writing in my diary instead of here. hmmm, maybe because in here i can't talk much. maybe only all those bitching and dissing about my life and the people around me. recently, kinda lazy to blog. maybe there ish nothing happening in my life or there ish a secret in my life? shucks. i don't know anything, don't bother me. i'll tell and shout it loud when the time comes and when finally i'm really very clear of what's going on.


`somehow it's different. somehow there's something lacking.
`somehow it's sufficient. somehow there's a need fer more.
`somehow it's pleasing. somehow there's love.

heloo people, while bathing, i suddenly got this new wishlist. haa. gosh, where's the money gonna come from?

1st on the list - a new adidas shoe that has caught my eye long ago
2 - a maple-leaf-like pattern three quarter pants i found at bugis
3 - a purple t-shirt
4 - a nice white top, let it be tight and girly
5 - a chomel necklace and bracelet
6 - my new samsung phone
7 - long awaiting levis jeans
8 - some biotherm/bodyshop make-up
9 - haversack (wonder shld i get the blood project shop's, love it but it's kinda ex)
10 - sandals, preferred colour white
11 - a jacket/sweatshirt (something lyke adidas's)
12 - a pair of coloured contact lenses
13- something fer someone
14- ahuh, and always not forgotten. a pink polo tee fer any guy friend of mine who dares to wear. haa.

`my dear.

i've been lyke cancelling all my dates recently. i don't really know fer what kind of reason. guess, i just wanted a rest time at home. i've began to feel something real troubling and i know the reason why. but i just couldn't speak my mind this time. usually i'll just start questioning and stuffs to get an answer fer myself, but this time i didn't chose this way. why? i myself don't really know either. scared? confusion? guess i really shouldn't go bother about it. gonna just control it fer the time being. until it gets really worse, i'll make sure i get my own answer. it might not be what i want but i'm sure i'll be pretty fine with either.

`the sweetness it gave. the sorrows it showered. the love i need.

argh... don't bother me fer the moment. leave me alone. these ar some words i'll shout out to those ppl who i don't give a damn about. why start telling me yur tales and shit when you won't ever listen to mine. i'm nt a wonder-woman here. i can't be always there to solve you ppl fcuking problems. finally, all my anger released. gosh, what was i mad about. i myself not being clear here too. kkays. erase that. sorry fer not blogging this few days. i had this very bad mood on monday night and i wasn't really able to express it down in words.

dad dad dad, i also wanna let ya noe. i'm nt a wonder-woman/child. i'm gonna be 17 soon and can't you just stop killing me with yur attitude. why can't you just listen to me fer that moment. why can't you listen? it doesn't mean you ar old and you know everything. i hate my life living up to yur standards. those ar yur dreams not mine. i wanna live my life, grow up the way i wanna. i've listened you yur every words as hard as i could. i myself didn't wanted to fail my english. you always make me sound that i did it on purpose. and money-wise. can't you just stop telling me yur own fairy-tales abt how hard you've got to live in yur oldies world. one day allowance only having 20 cents. face reality my dear, now ish 2003. it's not 1965. those ar the past. i don't wish to blame ya fer anything. i just wanna ya to listen to me and understand me.

lastly, i'm beginning to feel weird about a particular subject. anyway, i might be too sensitive. argh... i won't bother. i won't.

`i don't lyke yur ignorance. i hate lies. beware be4 you speak one.

give me some time kkays. kinda lazy to blog. so bare with me. sorry.

`inspiration stuck.

kkays, i'm beginning to love this template fer no reason. somehow i feel that the stone figure on the top left corner symbolises something. i'm kinda relax today after a tight meal at jack's place fer my mothers' day treat and tata i could only say jack serves the best black pepper steak. btw, HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY!!

suddenly, i lost track of what to do. haa, at first i wanna keep myself busy but now i'm kinda blur of what should happen next. wah, don't bother. if i happen to forget about any of yur dates or to miss it, forgive me. but to say i really hate it. when i'm free, nobody dates me. but when i'm dated on which ever particular day, just it somehow happens that another one will request me out on the same day. argh... and this ish not the first time. but who cares, as long as i'm here, as long as you ppl need me, call me out. but to remind i'm still cash flow tight. haa. i need a job badly now and even when sch starts.

`u either win or lose in this game.

hmm, i'm idling. actually i wanted to sleep. but i need to update my friend his soccer score. so here i am, still trying to keep myself relax. i'm getting bored. and i don't wanna get stuck into this suitation. cause' it's been past moments, i've got myself worried and thinking fer no reason basically cause i'm bored. so just like what i've said few days ago, it's a total new beginning and so far everything ish going jolly well. i'm starting to keep myself busy all while and yeah most importantly, alot of things don't bring much significance to me now. i mean i'm not as sensitive as i used to be and if anything big/small gonna happen, i'll just sit back and wait and watch. i'm plainly much a white piece of paper. kkays, after reading this, don't complain to me that i'm back to those days. i'm not having a depression now. i'm just stating my change. i'll be as cheerful as i used to be. i'll smile to you. gosh, i think i should cut the crap now. anyway, life to me now ish normal. i'm sleeping, eating, enjoying and relaxing. yeah, although a big amount of slacking at home but i don't wish to do anything now. really i think it's the time my mind should rest well and prepare fer more.

kkays, i've been reading a few blogs recently. and i just wanna comment something here, in my blog. sometimes struggling too much will only make you get totally sick out of something. never go wondering about why things booms here and there, don't ever even make yur dreams haunt you. sometimes somethings ar better to let go den to keep burging on it. believe me. it's gonna be hard, it's never easy but it's the best thing that should be done. that's just basically my advise from my experience. yeah, although it's not a big stack but it's painful enough to bring me into a disaster.

`votre sourire charme
`now i know when to pull the tag or when to let go

btw ppl, i've chose a new template fer my blog. if u see no change, refresh!!

`i control my life. i choose my style. i speak my way.

er, so i didn't blog yesterday did i? sorry, i was too tired to blog and even to write my diary. i woke up at 11am and that's kinda a miracle fer me. haa. anyway, i got up early cause my friend had an assignment early and i was suppose to accompany him after he's duty. yeah, but things dragged and i ended up meeting him at 3. and westmall was totally a boring place. my spirit flew here and there fer an hour. guess i didn't really lyke to shop alone or even out alone. so end of my stupid tale. i took the train and there we went, back to bugis again. haa. twice in a week. but this time we did some shopping around the place. yeah, and he got his favourite green bermudas and a black t-shirt. a total shot fer him. me? i did fancy 1 three-quarter but i didn't bought it. but come to think of it. it's 50% off. why didn't i bought it? haa. maybe next time back there? i'll see to it. after shopping and stuffs, we went to shaw tower once again fer a movie, 'whiteroom'. er, it's not that scary that could make yur goosebumps shoot up. just basically anticipating? anyway, don't catch it, not worth the money. kkays, after all this... gosh, i'm getting abit long winded here. i tink i better stop typing. it's getting bored in here. the rest of the stuffs i guess nobody ish that interested after all so i'll shut fer the time being.

`to fly? to soar? where's yur next destination?

hey babes, i'm back home or let's say i've reach home an hour ago. today i went out to many places. gosh, i think i had something lyke a marathon. a walking one. hee. firstly, i went bugis. and from there i walked to shaw towers fer X-Men 2. it's cool, kinda interesting especially when the show ish filled with mutants with special abilities. all damn powerful and unique in their own way. haa. i know that ish called movie. but it's really nice. after the movie, my friend and i walked to suntec. we fooled around the whole building and started thinking of walking to funan. and then? there we went. but we stop-by at raffles city fer a moment through city-link. nothing much food that caught our pleasure so zoom and boom. we ended up in funan 'the it mall'. looked fer a keyboard my friend was kinda interested in but didn't got it. so we ate at pastamania with my favourite spicy chicken and him the country baked pasta. after a really stuff meal of my breakfast cum lunch cum dinner, we walked towards boat quay. and guess what. on our way there, we saw a shemale and he/she nearly fell. after finding that the sea smelled rather salty there, we walked out way towards esplanade. and while passing by the fullerton hotel, my friend forced me in. haa, i did went in. it's damn nice and class inside. even the toilets ar fantastic relaxing with a big arm chair inside plus so many transparent glassbowls. so long so far, we dragged our way to one fullerton, the one with the merlion there. yeah yeah and blah blah. haa. halfway to esplanade. he decided to go to marina bay, the one opposite where we were looking. so we started walking towards city-link again and tata we reached city hall mart station and then marina bay mrt station. took a bus near the park and starting walking inside. er, the place was not as dark as fort canning park ba. so every step was fine. walk ard saw stars. sat here and there. went to the playground fer swing and then hop in a taxi and went home.

`scary, wonderful, alright

er. later i'm gonna catch the real madrid match. anyway, i'm fine today. nothing much happen cos i'm not out fer any purpose. got up at near to 4 today. hee. gosh, i'm really becoming a piglet. okies. receive a sms from gilbert early morning. i replied him but he didn't seem to reply mine. and i discovered that the sms was sent at 8 plus in the morning. so early.

`whoooosh

what has gone has been gone. i'm not gonna keep myself struggling fer it either. i'm gonna look forward. haa. gosh, what was i thinking? actually things aren't bothering me either. it's just that a few recent people keep reminding me. shhh... i'm alright and in a peace of mind now. now, just push me foward towards a new path i'm gonna crave fer myself.

`hugs and kisses

Daily Horoscope - May 7, 2003
First Name: Melissa Sun Sign: Sagittarius Gender: F

Obstacles that you may have been encountering in attainment of cherished goals could suddenly seem to be melting away, clearing the way for making your dreams come true, Melissa. This could involve physical health, plans for travel and education, and self-expression. You could also be feeling especially passionate at this time, so a romantic evening with that special someone would be especially enjoyable. You're feeling great, so make sure you look your best as well!

Love-Sunny Day/Career-Cloudy/Health-Sunny Day

`so anyone wanna date me out tml? hee.

kkays, after some thought and talks yesterday, my mind suddenly had this struck. today ish a total new beginning. haa. think i'm just a little mood swing. crazy as i've always been. anyway, things ar settled in my mind. hence, everything much as well be fine. be back fer more during the night.

`lalalala~

Daily Horoscope - May 6, 2003
First Name: Melissa Sun Sign: Sagittarius Gender: F

You may have been having a hard time lately reaching the objectives you had set for yourself. Unfortunately for you Melissa, today will be no different, and you may begin to feel a bit dissatisfied with the way your life is going at the moment. You will be asking yourself certain questions about your life goals. Does your personal life live up to those goals, and are you able to express your wonderful creativity as much as you would like?

Love-Thunder/Career-Thunder/Health-Cloudy

`gosh, seems that tml won't be great too.
`so true right? *

Hmm, today i've gone out to celebrate my pal's birthday. i'm so sorry to her that we didn't done much suprising or grand celebration fer her. but i hope she's happy to just hab us to celebrate with her. kkays, other than all of this, i'm kinda tired and not feeling that good. so i'll shall shut my mouth today. sometimes, it's right not to think.

`ger ger, u can't do anything.

Your Daily Horoscope for May 05, 2003

Dear Melissa,
Your spirit is sparkling, Melissa, and you may feel yourself filling up with tremendous energy as you go about your day. Your sense of adventure is at a monthly peak, and there is very little that can get you down. One area of your life that might be slightly difficult for you to deal with right now, though, is your world of love and romance. For some reason, you may feel like this is the one domain in which things aren't going the way you would like them to. The secret is to be patient.

`so ish this true? *

i feel weird, i feel real weird. this shldn't be the way i shld be feeling now. gosh, what am i trying to say? i myself dunno. anyway, horoscope not being quite good fer next week. just hope it gets better. but firstly why am i so into such stuffs? kkays, finally i've got an explanation fer myself. i've realise it's when i feel that nothing ish happening in my life and i wanted to know what will or may happen. kkays, i'm gonna stop the crap fer now. now although i'm getting my allowance soon. but i'm still cash flow tight cause i wanna control myself. maybe fer the moment, i can't get much stuffs fer myself. anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY QIYAN!!

`eternal hope? star shines?

YOU ARE LANA!


What Castmember Of Smallville Are You?
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The romantic daydreamer. For you, the greatest
thing in life is getting to know perfect love.


Which daydreamer type are you?
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Blue Eyes


What Color Eyes Should You Have?
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-Sensitive- You're Sensitive, and you'd like to
stay that way. Sorry,listened to a bit too much
Jewel there. You're sweet and very emotionally
charged. You definitely love the person you're
with, and always want to know how they're
feeling so you can make sure they're happy.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
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cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed


What Sign of Affection Are You?
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er, today ish one of my good sista meiling's birthday. so let's wish her HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY!!! haa. kinda busy today. i woke up reluctanly at 12 plus. then got myself prepared to get to town. went to ck tangs with another good sista of mine qiyan. we shop around and got a heart-shaped necklace and bracelet fer mei. i love the bracelet, it's nice man. haa. to my liking. anyway, i'm still going back to get myself some of these stuffs, since i hab none. kkays. i'm gonna be kinda broke soon. infact by the next outing, i'll be. yeah. i've gone to take neoprint with qiyan. gosh, i think we did many weird poses. haa. yeah, after ther shopping and photo taking, we went cold storage to get our food fer the party celebration at my house. kkays, dishes of the day was soup of the day, spagetti, roast black pepper chicken, vegetables and fer desert ish kaya cake. haa. after the eating with meiling, adeline, qiyan, nic yeo, derek, kenneth, yao guo and han qi, we watched darkness falls. the day was fine, although someone accidentally leaked out the news to mei that we ar celebrating fer her, but i guess she was still pretty happy to see all of us here fer her. (= guess now they ar at another friend's house relaxing. they should be having fun. hee. me? i'm stuck at home to sleep. haa.

`a little warm message might not mean much, u see?

Pink:
You see the world in bright pink. The world is a
happy, happy place! You love all people and
things!! Life is great! You're just like a
happy child. Spread the cheer.


What color do you see the world in?
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You're the loving smile,the one that is entirely
devoted to others,especially that one
person.You really can't get them out of your
head,but then,you don't really want to.


What Kind of Smile are You?
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You have a mysterious kiss. Your partner never
knows what you're going to come up with next;
this creates great excitement and arousal never
knowing what to expect. And it's sure to end
in a kiss as great as your mystery.


What kind of kiss are you?
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